West Staines Massive

Big Up Yoself!

Submit your work to the The West Staines Massive: WestStaines1@gmail.com

Dec 19, 2008 7:17pm
No Words

No Words

Comments (View)
Dec 19, 2008 1:11pm
Dec 19, 2008 1:07pm
Dec 18, 2008 9:08pm

As if you needed any more reasons to hate the New York Times, here’s one of their trademark columnists using a single personal anecdote to proclaim an entire societal trend:

That dinner party was almost 10 years ago; it was the last time I saw anyone visibly drunk at a New York party. The New York apartments and lofts which were once the scenes of old-fashioned drunken carnage — slurred speech, broken crockery, broken legs and arms, broken marriages and broken dreams — are now the scene of parties where both friendships and glassware survive intact. Everyone comes on time, behaves well, drinks a little wine, eats a few tiny canapés, and leaves on time. They all still drink, but no one gets drunk anymore. Neither do they smoke. What on earth has happened?

Try and follow the logic here. The author hasn’t seen anyone get shitfaced in a while. Ergo, no one gets shitfaced anymore. Makes perfect sense to me. Maybe you should go to parties with people other than your fucking bridge club, honey. If you think people in New York don’t get drunk anymore, you may very well be the dumbest person alive.

- -Drew Magary
Comments (View)
Dec 18, 2008 4:00pm
Dec 18, 2008 2:50pm
Jesse Eisenberg, from Squid and the Whale, great movie
Gabe Wilson, From Tufts University
Micheal Douglas, Fan of Pepperoni Pizza

Jesse Eisenberg, from Squid and the Whale, great movie

Gabe Wilson, From Tufts University

Micheal Douglas, Fan of Pepperoni Pizza

Comments (View)
Dec 18, 2008 1:35pm

It’s a commonly accepted fact of life that white people of all ages love lists, with that in mind we present West Staines Massive’s favorite songs and albums of the year. Starting off today with The Walkmen - In The New Year. This song rocks…Hard.

(Please ignore hipster bullshit in the intro)

Comments (View)
Dec 17, 2008 2:52pm
Photo taken at the Thompson Center (State of Illinois Building) this afternoon.  I cropped myself out so i wouldnt make anyone jealous, and put Borat in…very nice!
-gladysmanjr.

Photo taken at the Thompson Center (State of Illinois Building) this afternoon.  I cropped myself out so i wouldnt make anyone jealous, and put Borat in…very nice!

-gladysmanjr.

Comments (View)
Dec 16, 2008 1:58pm
lindsayrobertson:
Of course he is. (Article.) (Via CakeWrecks.)

lindsayrobertson:

Of course he is. (Article.) (Via CakeWrecks.)
Comments (View)
Dec 16, 2008 1:18pm
Dec 16, 2008 9:34am

Thoughts on the bailout.

“Again out of destruction, a new spirit of creativity arises”- Nietzsche

Why are we giving these fucks $15 billion, 60% of the country is against it, I just don’t get what good it’s doing? “O we’re saving jobs” people say, but what kind of jobs are we saving? UAW workers make an average of $73/hour (including benefits). Toyota workers? They make just $48. The UAW can cry all they want about the tax breaks given to the Japanese, Korean and German car companies to manufacture over here, but this was their idea. The UAW wanted to “even the playing field,” feeling the other workers would organize. This backfired on them. Now I’m not completely anti-union, but the strength of the UAW is driving costs up so much for American car companies that they can no longer compete with foreign owned firms. Letting the big 3 die is letting the free market playing itself out.

Why does the Government feel the need to jump in and save these companies? The Dems control both houses of congress, the presidency, and the Zionist media, and it’s just like the democrats to give away money, but why to the car companies?

Think of all the real progress we could make if we spent that money in a progressive area. I’m sure some of that $15 billion could make it so the MBTA in Boston would run past 12am, I’m sure it could fix up some bridges in need of repair (give that job to the old UAW workers for all I care.) I’m sure you could make some real progress on renewable energy with that money. That’s what $15 billion should be spent on, making the whole country better, not saving obsolete jobs. We just came off 8 years throwing money away at a senseless war in Iraq with the most free spending president in the history of the United States. While we were doing that, look at China, I mean did you see that Olympic opening ceremony? Those guys are freaking nut jobs!!

But now that it seems to be academic that the big 3 will get that $15 billion; here is what they should have to do with it: After forcing SUV’s and other oil chugging cars down our throat, the big 3 should have to commit to spending half the money they get on R&D, and on developing more fuel efficient cars. That money would go a long way toward creating the most fuel efficient cars in the world, because as long as they have to keep making cars in America, the big 3 will never be able to compete on price, so they’ve got to find a way to DIFFERENTIATE their product, and fuel efficiency is how they can do that.

And if they have to appoint someone Car Czar, why not Mitt Romney, he would take the job in a second (The whole “My dad was governor of Michigan” thing), it would play well with republicans, make them think we want to work together (jokes on you suckers), and Mitt Romney has proven that he knows how to run a business

Sure Ford, GM and Chrysler are/were American institutions, brands synonymous with America. But so were Pan-Am and TWA. At the end of the day if the Roman Empire can fall, why can’t three companies whose time has passed them by? The new “Big Three”: Honda, Toyota and VW will be able to do pick up a lot of the old guard’s assets, dump all the fat, and continue to make the best cars for America.

Comments (View)
Dec 16, 2008 8:32am

People from Alabama being a bit racialist


Pretty much everyone agrees that Buffalo coach Turner Gill—who was interviewed for the job—is infinitely more qualified to run a football than “5 and 19 Gene Chizik.” (And Tommy Tuberville is probably still more qualified than both of them, but that’s another story.) Yet, Gill did not get the job and in case you hadn’t noticed … Gill is black.

Now we’re not saying that the powers that be at Auburn chose Chizik over Gill simply because Gill is African-American and the school is located in the heart of the Old South. Everyone else will say it for us. In fact, some are even claiming that Gill’s biggest strike against him was not his own skin color, but that of his wife, who is white.

ESPN.com football writer Mark Schlabach told “Outside The Lines” today that two other SEC coaches told him, straight up, that Gill would never get the Auburn job, because he’s married to a white woman. Charming.

Auburn alum Charles Barkley added his own fuel to fire when he called out his alma mater for their choice of Chizik. He spoke to Gill about the job and claimed that Gill was concerned his marriage would be a factor before he even took the interview.

"We talked about the whole race thing in Alabama," Barkley said. "I told him it’s there and it’s going to be anywhere you go. I told him you can’t not take the job because of racism. He was worried about being nothing more than a token interview. He was concerned about having a white wife. It’s just very disappointing to me."

Barkley also pointed out that when Auburn hired a new basketball coach back in 2004, he suggested three African-American coaches who had taken their teams to the NCAA tournament, but they chose the only interviewee who had not—noted-white man Jeff Lebo.

"I think race was the No. 1 factor," said Barkley … "You can say it’s not about race, but you can’t compare the two resumes and say [Chizik] deserved the job. Out of all the coaches they interviewed, Chizik probably had the worst resume."

Racism charges aside, is there any doubt that Auburn AD Jay Jacobs does not have a single clue remaining? He played dumb and professed to be shocked when Tommy Tuberville “resigned,” but the misguided hiring of Chizik away from a horrible Iowa State makes his judgment even more suspect.

Not that things are any better up in Ames. Even though most Cyclone fans are probably happy to see Chizik go, at least one Iowa State player is a little miffed at his former coach. Freshman wideout Darius Darks (shown here taking a strong stand against “bitchassness”) took his complaints to the most obvious forum—Facebook—where he posted some homemade videos (already removed) of himself chewing out his mentor.

"A lot of people asking me what I’m going to do with coach Chizik leaving. I understand business is business, but this man lied," Darks said in the video. "At a team meeting he was sitting there saying ‘I told your mother, Jerrod Black, and I sat on your auntie’s couch, Darius Dark, and I told her I would take care of you while you was up here at Iowa State.’ Where’s that n—— at now? Auburn University."

In the second video, Darks introduces Jeremiah Schwartz, who was a freshman running back from Florida who played for the Cyclones in 2008.

"Let me explain something really quick," Schwartz said in the video. "Rule one: Don’t f—- with a Florida n——. Rule two: Don’t lie to your team. Rule three: Respect rule two."

Darks then ended the video by putting on a Michigan State jersey. Seriously. Hey, don’t bring them into this mess

-Deadspin http://deadspin.com/5110639/was-turner-gill-denied-the-auburn-job-because-of-his-white-wife 

Comments (View)
Dec 15, 2008 4:36pm
Dec 15, 2008 4:07pm

Lil Wayne- King Kong

Comments (View)
Dec 15, 2008 3:57pm

WEEZY 101

This is the premiere edition of Weezy 101 on West Staines Massive. Here we will attempt to shine some light on the lyrics of Lil Wayne. The first song we will tackle is King Kong off Da Drought 3 mixtape.

“King Kong”
 
A term used by urbanites to represent the “bass, bumpin’, thumpin’, rumblin’, knockin’, hot beats,” that are in a car from music being played loudly.  All of which refers to a Gorilla pouding the inside of a car trunk creating the extremely loud “bumpin’” sound from a car as they are driving though the streets, where you may “hear it before you see it”.
 
“If you hear me before you see me I got King Kong in the trunk” - Weezy F
 
“Banana Clips”
 
A large capacity magazine for Automatic weapons, Named after “banana clip” because it’s shape resembles a banana
 
“And I got more banana clips than chimpanzees”

 

 “Benjamins”
 
Benjamins are 100 dollar bills.  They are called Benjamins because some old white guy named Benjamin is on the face of the bill.
 
“Married to the Benjamins, battle all my enemies, ridin wit Big Foot, Harry and the Hendersons”“
 
“Harry and the Hendersons”
 
1980’s movie with the old guy from 3rd Rock about a family meeting Bigfoot (Harry).  Hendersons meet Big Foot, are scared of Big Foot, embrace Big Foot, set Big Foot Free.

 

 

-GladysMan Jr.

The Legendary Legend Gladysman Jr. Is a frequent contributor to West Staines Massive. He’s all about that Cake, hes trying to marry Betty Crocker.

Comments (View)
Page 1 of 3